Life Lesson Month of May: Blog 2- Letters from Mom & Mimi

Dear Ellie,

Although I normally only work two days a week (while you are at preschool), recently I took a four day long training on infant massage.  It turned out to be one of the most rewarding classes I have ever taken (but given where I am in life, that makes sense).  I only wish I had my new knowledge three years ago when you were born or four years ago when Kyle was in the NICU.  As I became a certified instructor, I came home and practiced on you… and even at your age of three, you and I had more time to connect together before bedtime (and you slept soooo good). 

Life Lessons Learned #10: Never underestimate the power of touch.

Here is what I learned as I became certified to teach infant massage to new parents:

Bonding is the establishment of an emotional relationship.  In the case of infant massage, this relationship is between the baby and his/her parents.  Sometimes, bonding isn’t spontaneous and needs to be learned (especially in cases where the moms or dads have been victims of sexual or emotional abuse and touch was not a positive experience for them).  Or perhaps that bonding is delayed due to adoption, depression, drug and/or alcohol abuse, having a special needs baby, financial stress, or perhaps it was an unwanted pregnancy, or the parents had a premature baby that needed time in the NICU.  But even in those cases where parent-baby bonding is instantaneous, that connection still needs to be nurtured.  Touch is the best way to forge that attachment. 

Being purposeful in teaching massage techniques by pointing out bonding benefits makes the experience more apparent and helps the parents become more aware of the goals.  Instructors should tell parents about the benefits of skin-to-skin contact, creating routine, spending time with their infant, increasing the baby’s immune system, relieving teething pain, and aiding colic and gas (all of these good practices are enhanced by massage).  Things like making eye contact and understanding the baby’s cues will form that attachment faster.  Parents will understand their babies better and be less frustrated and relaxed themselves. Massage is beneficial for both the parents and the baby.

For those working parents who put their children in daycare, massage is a way to connect with your baby after a long and stressful day.  It enables you to spend time with your child (with no other outside stimuli) and focus only on the baby.  Massage allows for love, attention, and little stress- all qualities that will enable a baby to thrive and will prepare him or her for situations later on in life.

Massage, facilitating bonding, allows for the child to trust and learn as well. By understanding routine and anticipation, a child will know and be able to communicate through cues his/her wants with regard to the therapy.  The more words a mother says to the child (through nursery rhymes, songs, and explanation) throughout the duration of the massage will further the vocabulary of that baby into his or her toddler years and beyond.

For premature babies in the NICU, research shows that massage allows them to be released up to five days sooner and increases weight gain.  Premature babies need to save their energy to develop and grow. Those babies who become disorganized, over-active, and over-stimulated can’t properly do that.  Massage helps calm them. It’s also a way for parents to do something for their little ones, as a parent can feel very helpless in the NICU (I know that first-hand).

Ellie, learn the techniques for infant massage when you have a baby.  You will cherish the time that you have with your little one, and knowing that you are doing something so healthy for them is such a rewarding feeling.

I love you Bean and thank you for letting me use you to practice on!

Mom

P.S. As an instructor, we teach parents to always ask their infant permission before they begin to massage.  It gets parents into the habit of teaching their children that they have a choice to be touched and it’s good practice for children to understand they have the right to say no.

Life Lessons Month of May: Blog 1- Letters from Mom & Mimi

Hi Ellie!

Because of a slight disaster this past week, I am prepared for my week’s blog.

I shall call it:

Life Lesson Learned #9: If you are not a housepainter by trade, then don’t attempt to do your own fix-ups.

Yes, I have a “Mimi” story for you.  While Poppy was away for the weekend I decided to surprise him when he got home by painting a small area (about a 3” X 3” patch) located on a wall leading to our basement.  As I prepared the area with painter’s tape and newspaper, I also scanned the rest of the wall to see if there was anything else I should touch up.  And the answer to that Ellie is, “Yes there was…. Plenty!”   So I pulled off the 6-inch strip of freshly laid blue painters tape, threw it away and got out the BIG role.  And then I proceeded to lay new tape that extended from the beginning of the stairwell (both sides), up both sets of stairs, through the hallway, back down the other side, and three large areas in the living room.  I then laid down two weeks of newspaper (thank goodness for the Sunday edition) all over the house to ward off damage from possible spills.  Proud of my professionalism, I was then ready to paint.  So I went out to the garage and looked underneath the workbench where we must have dozens of paint cans stored.  Now Ellie, keep this in mind… I did not have my glasses on, but I knew that all I needed to look for was the ‘color sample’ on top of the paint can.  Once I found it, I opened it, stirred it and got started.  Starting on the 3” X 3” wall I couldn’t find an appropriate stopping place so I just painted the whole wall.  Then, I went to the next level of steps and opted to ‘touch up’ the shorter of the two walls that lined those steps.  Since it is an extremely short wall, I just went ahead and painted that whole area too.  Next, I tackled the opposite side but since it is a much taller wall, I chose to stop right below the light switch.   My next stop was across the room where there were three miniscule smudges well below a collage of pictures I have hanging on a wall.  So I painted a 4’ X 4 ‘ exposed area while keeping about an inch distance between my paintbrush and the picture frames.  Once that was completed I headed to another area in the living room next to the bay window and painted another large patch.  If you are thinking I should be done by now… not by a long shot.  Another wall, center room, also had some smudge marks.  So I painted that one too being careful around the light switch and vent.  But that wall was also tall so I stopped just below the picture hanging there.  Then came the hallway, both sides.  At this point I started to get tired so even though I painted the entire length, I stopped at hip level.  Lastly I had to take care of a few nicks and fingerprints near the railing area on the tallest wall, which spanned both floor levels.  Not wanting to get out the ladder, I painted a line at eye level and covered everything below it with the exception of the light switch and around the handrail.  Now I was done.  Or so I thought.  I decided not to clean up or return the paint can to the garage just in case I missed a spot.  But I thought it best to wait until the paint dried to see if there were any such areas (it seemed to be taking awfully long!).  Well, after a couple of hours, more like (many), I checked over my work.  Since the sun was setting, it seemed to be casting shadows on my walls.  But upon closer inspection, that was not so.  Ellie… all my so-called ‘touch-ups’ were a different shade (and quite noticeable I might add) from the walls original paint color.  Maybe if my brush strokes went in a straight line instead of all over the place it wouldn’t have looked so bad.   At first I was shocked, then horrified, then thought, “Uh-oh… Poppy is going to kill me!”  Since it was already late in the evening I figured I would just clean up, put everything away and deal with it the next day.  So when I went to put the lid back on the paint can, there, in big bold black magic marker letters were the words ‘DON’T USE!’  Uh-oh.  How could I have ever missed that???  (Remember back at the beginning of the story when I said I was not wearing my glasses?  Well, there lies the answer!)  Now I knew I was going to be in BIG trouble.  So I just went to bed and prayed that during the middle of the night somehow the two shades of paint would come together and be as good as new in the morning.   After all, Jesus was a carpenter, right?  So painting should be right up his alley.  And I don’t think there is anyone more ‘miracle savvy’ than HIM.  Well, he must have had way more important prayers to answer because when I woke up the next morning my walls were still two-toned!  Oh well, I tried.  So off to the airport I went to pick up Poppy and gently break the news.  I greeted him with a big smile, a big kiss, an “I missed you very much”, and an “I love you very much” and then proceeded to go into my story of trying to do a good deed that backfired.  When we walked into the house Poppy looked all around and his comment was “Holy Mackerel Mic!”  El… instead of getting mad, Poppy just started to laugh.  I am not sure if he was in shock or just chalked it up to a typical ‘Mimi’ incident, but honestly, his giggling made me breathe easier.  Together we decided that before I attempt to “fix” it, he would talk to a painter friend of his to see if that is even feasible or if we should just hire a professional to take care of it.  I am opting for the professional, as I no longer want to re-paint.  It is kind of a boring job and I don’t want to give up another whole day to it (I’ve moved on)!

So that is my story for this week Ellie-bean.  I think the lesson I have learned is to leave the house painting to those who know what they are doing, and I should just stick to finger painting with you.  After all, those kinds of smudge marks are always welcomed!

 (the latest beautiful Ellie original!)

(your portrait of Poppy)

Love you El!

Mimi

Life Lesson Month of April: Blog 4- Letters from Mom & Mimi

Dear Ellie,

Sometimes I wonder if you are 3 or 33 when it comes to your vocabulary.  I love that you and I can have conversations (that actually can be abstract).

Life Lessons Learned #8:  As a mom, watch what you say… your daughter will absorb everything and become a walking mini-me.

You have said all these phrases and then some:

1.     “What the heck?” when caught off guard.

2.     “Ohmygosh!” said with true astonishment in your tone.

3.     Pretending to talk on a cell phone, “Oh hi, how are you?  Oh no… hmmm…  I’m so sorry.”

4.     You typically start a sentence with “Usually, I…” or sometimes, “Actually, I…” or, “Well…”

5.     “Two more minutes” and this one is taken completely out of context and always said before naptime and before bedtime.

6.     “Shhh!” said with a finger to your lips and a very stern look as you pretend to talk on your cell phone if you are interrupted.

7.     “Uggghhh!  No Joe!  I’m so disappointed in you,” when you see how Joe makes a mess of his food (and for full effect of irritation, one hand is on your hip, the other is pointing at the mischievous cat).

8.     “I was so frustrated,” explaining your feelings to my mom about the cat’s naughty behavior.

9.     “The Easter Bunny isn’t going to visit her house!” you said rather loudly at the grocery store in reference to the little girl not far from you who was having a tantrum just days before Easter.

10. “Don’t talk with your mouth full!” or sometimes if your mouth is full when I ask you a question, you put up your pointer finger to quietly ask me to wait until you swallow.

11. “Here’s the deal.  First, we go to school, and then we go…” as you bossily inform your dolls or sometimes me of the agenda.

12. “Oh I didn’t realize you were sitting there!”

13. “One second, I’m busy.”

14. “You know what?  I love you!” said randomly throughout the day.

15. In response to me saying it’s prayer time and I need your help so you will participate, you say, “It’s ok.  You know how to.  You can do it all by yourself,” speaking as if I were the three old needing encouragement.

16. “Do you want to go to Pee in the Pot?” referring to the store Pea in the Pod.

17. “Should we go try on lipstick?” pulling me toward the cosmetic counter at the department store.

18. After being asked a question, you ponder for a moment by saying, “I have to think,” before answering.

19.  “Oh fine,” you reluctantly relent when I ask you to do something you may not want to do.

20. “Do you know what I mean,” you ask to make sure you really are understood.

21. “Here’s what I’m going to do…” you tell me before enacting your grand plan.

22.  “You forgot to say please!” again reminding me to be polite (and this also goes for thank you and bless you).

23. “You forgot to cover your mouth,” said to anyone sneezing or coughing that obviously forgot that basic rule.

24. “I’m tired of cleaning up!” you tell me when I ask you to help me tidy up the living room.  And all I can do to respond to that one El is say, “Me too!”

25. “Somewhere over the rainbow, bluebirds scream,” you sing very seriously and I have to laugh to myself because you butcher the words to songs just as badly as Mimi and I!

26. “Are you talking to yourself again?” you ask your Mimi and I if you catch us out of the blue. And sadly, the answer is usually yes!

27. “Silly me!” you say when you’ve made a mistake.

28. “I’m just going to get this over with,” you mutter before you do something you don’t like.

I need to remember that you have a memory that astounds me.  Your Mimi asked you the other day if you wanted a hotdog for dinner and you said, “Nope, they make me sick.”  When your Mimi asked me about that to clarify, I recalled over a year ago (possibly close to two years ago), you ate a hotdog and threw up everywhere as you had the onset of the flu. 

Ellie, your vocabulary is so large that sometimes you switch your words around and it makes me giggle. For example, you say “paper toilet” instead of toilet paper, “towel paper” instead of paper towel, and “burnt sun” instead of sun burnt.  This latter one came about after our Florida vacation when your Poppy went golfing and forgot to wear sunscreen.  This showed me exactly how much of a rule follower you are. That evening, your Poppy said he would take you in the pool at 8pm (it was dark, aside from the exterior lights). You insisted that both you and him put on sunscreen.  Your Poppy tried to get away with just a pretend spray here and there but you made sure that you and him were lathered down to your toes! 

And while on the plane heading to Florida, I finally asked you why you weren’t watching Tangled or Madagascar on your iPad (just before landing).  Your response, “We don’t watch TV during the day!”  Oh Ellie, I love that you are my sweet girl who obviously listens to everything I say, but remember that rules can be broken at the right place and time too!

I love you for who you are now, who you are becoming, and all the laughs we have along the way!

Mom

Life Lesson Month of April: Blog 3- Letters from Mom & Mimi

Good Morning Ellie!

Well after getting dressed this morning, it became quite apparent to me as to what my blog will be about this week.

Life Lesson Learned #7:  There really is a Muffin-Top fairy.

Yep.  There is Ellie.  I know this because she apparently came and visited late last night while I was sound asleep.  I think she probably poked me once or twice, giggled out her magical words “Hoo-hoo, hee-hee” while swooshing her fairy wand all around my hips, thighs and abdomen.  And then ‘poof’ disappeared before I awoke.  I’ve come to this conclusion because I tried putting on a pair of my jeans this morning and for some reason they were not sliding over my hips like they are supposed to.  I thought to myself, “Humph… that is odd,” thinking that maybe I put them in the dryer on a heat-setting that is a tad bit higher than I normally would use… maybe they just shrunk a little (just so you know Ellie that when it comes to ‘the female gender, clothes, and weight’, there is no rational thinking… I have never adjusted the heat setting on my dryer for anything, ever!).  Anyway back to getting dressed this morning, my common sense was telling me that my ‘tight’ jeans were definitely the dryer’s fault… and Poppy’s too, because he is the only other one living in this house that could have changed its settings.  So I lay on the bed and slid my jeans on that way.  And guess what?  No problem!  I was even able to snap them!  Then I went to sit up and oh my… it was not a pretty site.  Ellie, like a fresh loaf of bread rising in the oven, my mid-section was slowly bubbling up and spilling over my jeans’ waistband, hence giving me the appearance of a ‘muffin top.’  I thought; how could this be?  We are finally on the tail of winter and I just put away my cozy pullover sweaters.  Could the Muffin-Top fairy have heard my constant complaining each and everyday for the last five months about how chilly I have been?  Did she think she was doing me a favor by giving me an added layer of fat to keep me warm?  Spring is coming which means thin-fabric T-shirts and tank tops!  So why would she visit me now instead of last November?  Is she following an alphabetical list and I just so happen to be one of the last women on it?  Doesn’t she know that it is impolite to visit someone unannounced?  How could she do this to me?  Who does that?  Oh… I know.  Her cousin the Dimple fairy arrives unannounced too (and I am not talking about those cute little dimples that you see on pretty faces!).  She never called me either, she just showed up late one night a few years (ok, many years) back and splashed the back of my legs with those so-called indents.  For some reason they aren’t as attractive from the rear view.  All I can say is thank heavens for peddle-pushers, aka very long shorts, as they are back in style!  OK… I seem to have gone off track again and need to refocus this blog back to muffin tops.  The problem is that the Muffin-Top fairy’s services are apparently non-refundable, as no one that I know of has ever seen her, nor does anyone know where she lives for that matter.  So I guess I am going to have to take matters into my own hands and trim down this new cupcake look that I am sporting.  And that would be with exercise.  (Ahhhh… another blog idea on a Life Lesson Learned:  Exercise; Oh how I hate to sweat!  I’ll save that one for a later date.)  Right now I think you, your mommy and I will start walking again.  There are certainly enough hills in this neighborhood to get our heart rates up.  Maybe in a month or two I will be able to tuck my shirts in and not feel so self-conscious.

So I guess the lesson to be learned here Ellie-Bean is; if you want to avoid a visit from the Muffintop fairy; you need to stay fit from the get-go.  Run around outside, play sports, be active, eat healthy, get enough rest and love life.  If you follow these simple suggestions I am pretty sure you won’t receive any surprise visits in the middle of the night during your lifetime.  So get your bike ready Bean because tomorrow is our first official day to walk.  But right now I am going to eat one of those cranberry muffins you and your Mommy baked last week as they are mmmm… mmmm delicious (it is definitely better to eat the muffins than to wear them!).

Love you El!

Mimi

Life Lesson Month of April: Blog 2- Letters from Mom & Mimi

Dear Ellie,

I am once again going to write about bedtime...

Life Lessons Learned #6:  There are many reasons why bedtime with a toddler can take long, so be prepared by addressing all of these excuses right before lights out (as said from Ellie herself):

1.  Well, when you go to bed then I’ll go to bed.

2.  I have a hangnail, I need a bandaid.

3.  I have a cut (that to the naked eye is invisible), I need a bandaid.

4.  (About 7 minutes later), Look my cut is gone!  It’s all better! I don’t need the bandaid anymore!

5.  I have a bump on my head (again, invisible), I need a bandaid.

6.  I have to go potty (for the third time in 3 minutes).

7.  I’m itchy, I need Aquafor (all over every inch of your body apparently).

8.  My socks are too tight (even though you wore them all day), I need new ones.

9.  Can you tell me the story of the day I was born?

10.  Can you sing me another song?

11.  Can you read me one more book?

12.  Come see my sad face!

13.  I’m hungry.  My stomach’s saying ‘I’m hungry, I’m hungry!’ (wonder where she got that from?).

14.  What day is today? (Thursday) What day is tomorrow? (Friday)

15.  I need one more pretend drink of water (from her play kitchen in her room).

16.  I need a real drink of water.

17.  I need to put my slippers away (that you haven’t worn for days and they have already been sitting out of the way).

18.  Can you fix my blanket?

19.  You didn’t put on your pajamas yet!

20.  I need to check something (as you wonder around your room aimlessly).

21.  I need to tell Daddy something.

22.  I forgot to tell Daddy goodnight.

23.  I need a tissue.

24.  Do you want to talk?  No?  How about tomorrow then?

25.  (Pointing to the top of your bookshelf) I need you to get me the game Candy Land (no Ellie, we will play it tomorrow)… Well, if we play it tomorrow, why can’t I play it tonight?
26.  It's still light outside!  How about if I wait until it gets dark? (Oh boy- it's not even close to June 21 yet!)

You usually ask for an extra book to read to yourself after I kiss you goodnight and I always agree to that for two reasons.  One, I want to encourage you to read (and I did the same thing as a kid) for you to see that books are magical.  Two, I love hearing you read aloud when I am downstairs.  Your memory for these stories is incredible and sometimes I can’t help but come back into your room and have you read to me.

The three main reasons though that I will always come back to your room after lights are out, is when you say, “I need one more kiss!” or “I need one more hug!” or “Do you want to snuggle with me?”  I can’t get enough of any of those!

I know this list will grow… as I figure out how to check these off before I leave your bedroom, you always come up with something new to try to get me back in!

I love you!

Mom

Life Lesson Month of April: Blog 1- Letters from Mom & Mimi

Hi Ellie-Bean!

And what a perfectly fit nickname you have for this blog as it has to do with Easter not the jellybeans mind you, but the Easter eggs)!  Yes… I do have a story to tell of the present (pertaining to you) as well as a story past (pertaining to your Mommy and Uncle Ryan.)  I shall call it:

Life Lessons Learned #5.   Simple traditions work just as well as complicated ones.

Well Bean… like every holiday, spending it with you is always so much fun!  To see the excitement in your eyes seems to bring out the ‘child of long ago’ in each of us.  But my story of you isn’t exactly about Easter Day… rather a few weeks back when you and I were playing ‘Hide the Eggs; Easter Bunny.’  Here is how we played it.  As always, we start off by playing house.  You are the baby and I am the mommy.  After a (pretend) day filled with lots of activities, I lay you on your (pretend) bed, the couch, and say goodnight.  Then I get six very colorful plastic Easter eggs… fill them with candy and pennies and small things from your play kitchen and put them in an Easter basket.  Now Ellie… before I go and hide them, I always tell you to turn your head and close your eyes.  Dutifully you do, but only for about 10 seconds… just enough time for me to go into the kitchen and put on a pair of bunny ears that I kept on the counter and then hop back into the living room to start my job.  Now the funny part is that I could always see you watching me from my peripheral vision but I pretended not to.  I would then hop around and whisper a bit loudly where I am placing the eggs, (all of which would be in partial view.)  Once I finished I would hop out of the room, take off my bunny ears and come back into the living room as the mommy.  I would yawn loudly and yell out, “Morning time!”  That would be your queue to jump off the couch and go in search of the Easter eggs.  And of course you’d make me giggle because you would follow my exact path that I had used when hiding them.  Once all six were found you and I would sit on the floor and you’d open each plastic egg to see what was inside.  Again, I found this hilarious because you always pretended to be surprised when you already knew what hidden treasures were in there!  Now most children would think this “Hide the Egg” game would be done, but not you.  Very quickly you would make a role reversal.  I would become the child and you would be the mommy/Easter bunny.  Once I was on the couch pretending to be asleep, you would hide the eggs in the exact same spots around the living room that I had just done ten minutes before.  The only difference was that when you said “Morning time” and I jumped off the couch… instead of me going in search of the eggs by myself, you would take my hand and show me where they all were and yell out “I found another one!” as though you yourself didn’t even know where they were hidden!  Ellie, in the past few weeks we have played this game not once, not twice but at least a dozen times and you never get tired of it.  Not only have we played it many times… we rarely change the hiding spots and you seem to be perfectly happy with that.  With you my darling granddaughter, it is not about making the “challenge” harder each time we play, but rather taking the time and playing something that you truly enjoy.

Now fast forward to last Saturday, the day before Easter.  Your Mommy and Daddy took you to an Easter egg hunt that took place on the grounds of the Knights of Columbus building.  

Poppy and I were thrilled to tag along and watch this amazing event that you were going to participate in.  

There were three large circular areas, age appropriate, that were staked out for the egg hunt and you opted for the 3 to 5 year old patch.  Once the gentleman in charge counted to three, all the children ran into the middle of the patch turning over clumps of hay and grabbing up the colorful eggs.  Ellie instead of scrambling like the others, you took your time picking up the eggs and slowly dropped them into your Kyle bag.  

It only took a matter of minutes for all the children present to scarf up the few hundred eggs that were hidden underneath the hay.  You were quite pleased with yourself as you found five eggs (all of which were in eyesight by the way), and you know what?  You couldn’t have been happier!  For it wasn’t about finding the most eggs or the cleverly hidden ones, it was just about enjoying the moment.

Now rewind to many, many years ago when your Mommy and Uncle Ryan were much younger, actually children themselves.  Yes the Easter Bunny visited their house year after year too.  Only back then he seemed to make his task, (hiding the Easter eggs and the Easter baskets), harder than it should have been.  Instead of just hopping into our home in the wee hours of the morning and randomly placing eggs and baskets here there and everywhere… he planned, strategized and mapped out our home placing them in nooks and crannies (some that we didn’t even know we had) as well as compartments that were near to impossible to find!  Here are a few examples Ellie:  one year the Easter bunny tied Ryan’s Easter basket using heavy shoe string to a sturdy hanger in his own closet.  He then got your Uncle’s winter ski jacket and hung it on the hanger making sure the dangling Easter basket was snug securely inside of it.  He zipped the coat up to its neck leaving no trace that the bunny had ever entered the closet!  It took your Uncle Ryan all morning to find that one!  Another time the Easter bunny hid your Mommy’s Easter basket in a 30” Pullman suitcase that was stored on the third shelf of the basements storage room!  Who would ever think to look in there????  Certainly not your Mommy!  As for the Easter eggs, well back then the bunny took time to hard-boil each and every egg (what was he thinking???!!!).  Anyway…  he would then carry them around the world hiding two-dozen or so in each home along the way.  It’s amazing that no one got salmonella poisoning back then!  When you think about it, those eggs sat hidden (some in well used sneakers) at room temperature for hours!  Thankfully the Easter Bunny always left Poppy and I a detailed note as to where he hid those colorful eggs.  We never really had to rely on the note because Poppy would get just as excited during the ‘hunt’ as your Mommy and Uncle Ryan did.  If Poppy saw an egg that one of them overlooked he would coax them back with the game Hot/Cold.  And if they still couldn’t find it, he would just come right out and tell them exactly where it was located!  I would get frustrated and tell Poppy to give them more time, but I guess in the grand scheme of things it was a smart tactic.  Otherwise we might have ended up with one very stinky house days later from lost or forgotten eggs!

I guess what I have learned this past week Ellie is that someone needs to tell the Easter Bunny that he doesn’t have to always try so hard to make his ‘bunny activity’ so challenging.  After playing “Hide the Easter Eggs” with you, I found out it is not about increasing the level of difficulty each time the eggs are hidden, but rather it is about enjoying family traditions and making memories from them!

I love you Ellie!

Mimi

Life Lesson Month of March: Blog 5- Letters from Mom & Mimi

Dear Ellie (my now official 3 year old!),

It is in our quiet time right before your nap that made me realize this:

Life Lessons Learned #4:  You are never too old to hold hands.

As I lay with you before you fall asleep for your afternoon rest, you always ask to hold my hand.  Although it’s usually a fleeting moment (as you quickly toss and turn), I want you to know how much comfort that gesture gives me (much more than it gives you, as I assume you mostly like the security that you have someone next to you).  Please know that no matter how old you get or how old I get, you placing your hand in mine will give me peace, love and joy.  Remember this as I age or if I get sick.  Small, quiet gestures sometimes mean the most and touch the heart the fastest.

I love you Bean!

Mom

PS- As much as I say you are stubborn, you have such a sweet and compassionate side too.  You show affection throughout the day by saying, “You know what Mama?  I love you.”  And at bedtime when we read books, you lean over and kiss my cheek during the stories.  Being three and speaking and acting freely from the heart is something I wish a lot of people didn’t outgrow.  Happy birthday my angel, my sunshine!

You celebrated your actual birthday with your cousin Colin in New Jersey this year!