Thursday, September 11, 2014
Final Thoughts Month of September: Blog 2- Letters from Mom & Mimi
The other day when I was getting ready to leave your house, you asked me to do the ‘I love you’. Of course I said yes as it has been our little ritual since you were a baby. But the question prompted your little friend, Kayleigh, who was playing with you at the time to ask, “How do you do an I Love You?” Oh Ellie, with a quick wink to you, I told Kayleigh that both you and I would be happy to show her. And your return smile, which spoke volumes, told us both just how special it was! And at that moment I also realized how important it was to blog about our customized ‘goodbye.’
Final Thought: The overwhelming affection you feel for someone can be expressed deeply and effectively without ever having to voice the words.
Ellie, I am not sure as to the exact timeframe we started this goodbye ritual, but what I do know is that it has strongly solidified our grandmother/granddaughter connection. When you and your Mommy would leave my house to return to yours via car, I always wanted to give you an extra special goodbye. So after getting you buckled into your car seat and giving you a kiss on your forehead I would close the car door and use hand gestures that go with the words I – Love – You before walking away. First, I would point to my eyes referencing the word ‘I’. Next, I would take my pointer fingers and thumbs from both hands and fashion them in the shape of a heart near my own to reference the word ‘Love.’ Lastly, I would ball up my left fist extending only the pointer finger, which of course pointed directly at you to reference the word ‘You.’ Then I would blow you a kiss, wave good-bye and re-enter my house thinking how did someone so tiny capture my heart with the magnitude that you did so easily? But I didn’t really need an answer, I already knew!
So now I will fast-forward to today when you are 4 ½ years old and yes, we still do this crazy and wonderful ritual. But let me tell you Ellie that you have fine-tuned it and with precision thought I might add (or rather fine-tuned me to do it exactly your way). Here is how we do the ‘I Love You’ today. First of all, it is no longer restricted to when you are in your car seat leaving me… you have now added our special goodbye to my leaving you! So whether I am standing outside of the car looking in at you or you standing outside of my car with me inside seat belted and ready to drive off, this is how we now do the ‘I Love You.’
Oh, and before I continue on I need to tell you that when you are in your Mommy’s car all windows must be rolled up and your Mommy’s car door must be shut! I am strongly guessing that you want to make sure that your Mama is not able to take any of my attention away that should be solely focused on you (yes, you two do fight at times over whom I should be listening too). Anyway… first I make a ‘V’ shape letter with the pointer finger and middle finger on my left hand and point it first at my eyes then at your eyes and then back to mine so that I have both yours and my attention when referencing the word ‘I’. Next I make the heart shape, with no added quirks, to reference the word ‘Love’ just like before. Then I point to you, again no added quirks here either, to reference the word ‘You.’ Now comes a slight change up as I have to blow you not one, but three kisses and follow them with a couple of selfie hugs. “Selfie hugs?” You or someone reading this might ask. Let me remind you of how they are performed. First you take your left arm and wrap it around your right shoulder. Then you take your right arm and wrap it around your left shoulder. Next you squeeze yourself just like you would a teddy bear if you wanted it to pop its stuffing out and follow that with shaking your upper body from side to side like you would a ragdoll! Thennnnnnnnnnnn…. I have to repeat this whole procedure again only this time switch my arm wraps! If you think this is the end of our ‘goodbye’ ritual Ellie, think again. I must then perform two more complete cycles of the arm-wrap with an added crazy facial expression each time. Oh and heaven forbid if I accidentally do any portion of this ‘goodbye’ out of order because then I have to start all over again from the very beginning (and yes El, I have had to start over many times! Obviously OSD and/or quirkiness run in our family as I can name a few other relatives with similar issues)! I guess it always makes for some fun stories!
But back to our ‘goodbye’ ritual… Ellie, you have had me do this in driveways, the church parking lot, department store lots and even the ice-cream lot. I am sure people who don’t know us but watch this crazy routine are probably thinking just that…. Crazy lady! But you know what I realized Ellie?... that I treasure this unique Ellie/Mimi habit that belongs to only us. Your friend Kayleigh made me see just how special it is El. And I pray this bond of ours never grows old.
Eye Heart U!